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幽默四則

2008-10-18 08:59
中學(xué)英語(yǔ)之友·上 2008年9期
關(guān)鍵詞:羊毛老頭兒湯姆

More Foolish

Father: Tom, how foolish you are! You were in Grade One last year, and now you are still in Grade One.

Tom: But a teacher in my school is more foolish. He was in Grade Three last year and now he is in Grade One.

更笨

父親:湯姆,你真是太笨了!去年你上一年級(jí),今年還是上一年級(jí)。

湯姆:可是我們學(xué)校有一個(gè)老師更笨,他去年教三年級(jí),今年倒教一年級(jí)了。

Do you know me?

Boy: Isnt the principal a fool?

Girl: Do you know who I am?

Boy: No.

Girl: Im the principals daughter.

Boy: And do you know who I am?

Girl: No.

Boy: Thank goodness!

你知道我是誰(shuí)嗎?

男孩:那個(gè)校長(zhǎng)難道不是個(gè)傻瓜嗎?

女孩:你知道我是誰(shuí)嗎?

男孩:不知道。

女孩:我是校長(zhǎng)的女兒。

男孩:那么你知道我是誰(shuí)嗎?

女孩:不知道。

男孩:謝天謝地!

Wool

Teacher: What do we get from sheep?

Boy: Wool.

Teacher: You are quite right. And what do we make from wool?

Boy: I dont know.

Teacher: Well, whats your coat made of?

Boy:My coat was made from my fathers old coat.

羊毛

教師:我們從羊身上能得到些什么?

男孩:羊毛。

教師:你說(shuō)得非常對(duì)。那么我們能拿羊毛做什么呢?

男孩:我不知道。

教師:嗯,那么你的衣服是用什么做的?

男孩:我的衣服是用我爸爸的舊衣服改的。

An Alarm Clock

A young man went to a mountain village for his holiday. One night he stayed at a small hotel near a train station.

Before going to bed, he went to the owner of the hotel and said to the old man, “Excuse me, sir. Will you please wake me up at a quarter to five? Im going to take the five oclock train tomorrow morning.”

“Oh, sorry,” the owner said, “I am afraid I cant. I dont get up that early.”

The young man started to go back to his room when he stopped and asked, “Do you have an alarm clock? That would help me.”

“Yes, here it is, young man.”

The young man took the clock happily and thanked the old man. But when he looked at it carefully, there appeared to be something wrong with it. “Does it ring on time?” he asked the old man.

“Sure! Just shake it when its time to get up, and itll ring.”

一只鬧鐘

一個(gè)年輕人到一個(gè)山村去度假。那天夜里,他住宿在火車(chē)站附近的一個(gè)旅館里。

上床睡覺(jué)之前,他對(duì)旅館老板——一個(gè)老頭兒說(shuō):“對(duì)不起,先生,請(qǐng)問(wèn)您能在五點(diǎn)差一刻叫醒我嗎?我明天早晨要乘五點(diǎn)的火車(chē)?!?

“哦,很抱歉”,旅館老板說(shuō),“恐怕不行,我不可能起那么早?!?

年輕人正想回到房間去,又停住了問(wèn):“那你有鬧鐘嗎?或許它能幫助我?!?

“我有,給你,年輕人。”

年輕人很高興地拿了鬧鐘,謝了老頭兒。但當(dāng)他仔細(xì)查看了鬧鐘后,發(fā)現(xiàn)似乎有毛病。 “它能準(zhǔn)時(shí)鬧嗎?”他問(wèn)老頭兒。

“那當(dāng)然!時(shí)間一到,你搖一搖,他就會(huì)響的?!?/p>

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