by anonymous

很多人覺(jué)得交朋友很難。其實(shí)并不難！你要做的只是從自己的保護(hù)殼里走出來(lái)，并且記住，如果你愛(ài)自己，別人也會(huì)愛(ài)你。對(duì)青少年來(lái)說(shuō)，交朋友的難易程度可能取決于幾個(gè)因素。當(dāng)然，你要花點(diǎn)時(shí)間了解一下他們是真正的朋友，還是會(huì)把你的秘密宣揚(yáng)出去的人。記住，交友需謹(jǐn)慎！

1. Relax. Its all about confidence—if you are nervous or try too hard to look cool youll just act weird[怪異的]， so you wont make many friends. You will stand out as overdoing[做得過(guò)分] something. You have to act like you have had plenty of friends in the past so even the “cool” ones will want to speak to you. You have to think of good reasons for why someone would like to meet you， think of the virtues[優(yōu)點(diǎn)] you have. So relax， people will like you for passing a peaceful energy.

2. Make the first move. Dont be shy； it wont help you in anything. Look around for someone that seems interesting， then relax and go up to talk to them. Say hi， give them your name if they dont know your name yet， ask how they are and just meet them. If you know a bit about them， for example， the person likes crafts[手工制作]， you can talk about that. A good subject to talk about to anyone is music， because almost everybody likes music， you can ask someone what kind of music they like and start a cool conversation with them and even find some things in common[共同享有的]. Sitting shy in a corner distances[使顯得遙遠(yuǎn)] you from everyone else. Become more outgoing[開(kāi)朗的]. Other topics could be movies or sports. Try not to get deep when you are first meeting somebody. Steer clear from[避開(kāi)] things like politics， religion and relationship problems， to name a few.

3. Be nice. How do you expect them to like you if you are not nice？ Put a calm smile on your face and find out what you and the person you are trying to befriend have in common. Youll be able to be more comfortable if you find out that other person has many things in common with you.

4. Be a good listener. Give attention to what they say， make eye contact[接觸] and show youre paying attention. Nod， agree， show you find what they say is interesting. Its important to be a good listener， because everyone likes to be heard， and if this person feels like youre listening to them， your new friend will enjoy your company[陪伴] more.

5. Be yourself. I know youve heard it a lot of times， but no one really likes a poseur[裝腔作勢(shì)的人]—people would like the real you better for your virtues， not a fake person no one really knows. For example， if you really lived the “thug[暴徒] life”and had it tough， you can easily be a gangsta[歹徒]. But if you are just trying to act a certain way or to be tougher than you really are， you should give it up. So just be you， speak your mind， that way people will enjoy being around you a lot more and feel comfortable that youre not trying to deceive[欺騙] them. Be yourself and you will get people that like you for you. If they dont like you for being yourself， then it is time to move on to someone else. Be natural， be the way that you were born to be. You were put on Earth for some purpose and to show it off.

6. Develop friendships. You may talk to someone now but soon theyll forget you if you stop. Youd better take the time to say hi to them every day and ask how they are doing. Say their name as often as you can， like once every three-five sentences， unless you know itd seem awkward[笨拙的]. When you greet them， say things like， “Hey Alex！”， “What you doing， Sarah？”， “Whats up， Miranda？” If you do that every day， theyll be happy that you care about them and remembered them， so they wont forget you.

7. Include those friends in your social life. Invite your new friends to go out together with you， go to the mall or hang out at a cool place. You guys should have fun together， so you can introduce your new friends to old friends and build your social circle from there， with people that accept each other.

1. 放松。關(guān)鍵在于信心——如果你很緊張，或是過(guò)分努力讓自己看起來(lái)很酷，那只會(huì)令你的行為顯得怪異，從而難以交到很多朋友。當(dāng)你過(guò)度地做某件事情，你會(huì)顯得格格不入。你必須表現(xiàn)得好像你以前已經(jīng)有很多朋友那樣去行動(dòng)，這樣，即便是那些很“酷”的人也會(huì)想和你說(shuō)話。你要想到別人有哪些很好的理由想要去認(rèn)識(shí)你，以及想想自己身上具備的優(yōu)點(diǎn)。所以，放松點(diǎn)吧，人們會(huì)因?yàn)槟闵砩掀胶蛯庫(kù)o的氣息而喜歡你的。

2. 主動(dòng)邁出第一步。不要害羞；害羞對(duì)你沒(méi)有任何幫助?？纯粗車倚┠芤鹉闩d趣的人，然后放松，走上前與他們交談。說(shuō)一聲“嗨”；如果他們還不知道你的名字，就把你的名字告訴他們；問(wèn)問(wèn)他們的近況，和他們見(jiàn)面吧。假如你對(duì)他們已有一些了解，比如你知道對(duì)方喜歡工藝品，你就可以聊聊這個(gè)話題。音樂(lè)是適合與任何人聊天的好話題，因?yàn)閹缀趺總€(gè)人都喜歡音樂(lè)。你可以問(wèn)問(wèn)對(duì)方喜歡什么樣的音樂(lè)，由此開(kāi)始一段很酷的交談，甚至還可能由此找到一些共同點(diǎn)呢。如果你只是羞怯地坐在角落，那只會(huì)把你和大家隔絕開(kāi)來(lái)。讓自己開(kāi)朗外向一點(diǎn)。至于其他話題，你們也可以聊聊電影或者體育。和初次見(jiàn)面的人盡量不要聊得太深入。要避開(kāi)諸如政治、宗教和感情關(guān)系等話題。

3. 態(tài)度親切友善。如果你的態(tài)度不友善，你又怎能期望別人會(huì)喜歡你呢？讓你的臉上露出平靜的微笑，試著找出你和你想要結(jié)交的對(duì)象有何共同點(diǎn)。當(dāng)你發(fā)現(xiàn)對(duì)方與你有許多共同點(diǎn)時(shí)，你們相處起來(lái)會(huì)舒服一些。

4. 做一個(gè)善于聆聽(tīng)的人。關(guān)注對(duì)方所說(shuō)的話，注意眼神接觸，表現(xiàn)出你正在認(rèn)真聆聽(tīng)。不時(shí)點(diǎn)頭同意，表明你對(duì)他們所說(shuō)的東西很感興趣。做一個(gè)好的傾聽(tīng)者很重要，因?yàn)槊總€(gè)人都希望有人傾聽(tīng)自己。如果對(duì)方覺(jué)得你在聽(tīng)他訴說(shuō)，你的這位新朋友便會(huì)更加樂(lè)于與你為伴。

5. 做真實(shí)的自己。我知道你已經(jīng)聽(tīng)過(guò)無(wú)數(shù)次了，但沒(méi)有人會(huì)喜歡裝腔作勢(shì)的人——人們會(huì)因?yàn)槟愕膬?yōu)點(diǎn)而更加喜歡真實(shí)的你，而不是那個(gè)無(wú)人真正了解的假象。假如你確實(shí)過(guò)著“暴徒生涯”，平時(shí)都是飛揚(yáng)跋扈，那么你當(dāng)一個(gè)黑幫成員會(huì)得心應(yīng)手。但如果你只是想裝成某種樣子，或是假裝比實(shí)際上強(qiáng)硬，那么你還是放棄吧。因此，做真實(shí)的自己吧，坦率地說(shuō)出自己的想法，這樣人們會(huì)更喜歡和你待在一起，為你不會(huì)欺騙他們而感到舒服自在。做真實(shí)的自己，人們會(huì)因此而喜歡你的。如果他們不喜歡真實(shí)的你，你就應(yīng)該繼續(xù)尋找其他朋友了。你只要自然流露，展現(xiàn)真我。你之所以來(lái)到地球上，總有某個(gè)原因的，向人們展示出來(lái)吧。

6. 發(fā)展友誼。你現(xiàn)在也許正在和別人交談，但一旦你停止，他們很快就會(huì)把你忘記。最好每天都抽點(diǎn)時(shí)間和他們打個(gè)招呼，問(wèn)問(wèn)他們的近況。盡可能多地提到他們的名字，每說(shuō)三、五句話就提一次他們的名字——除非你覺(jué)得那樣做會(huì)很奇怪。如果你每天都和他們打招呼，說(shuō)：“嗨，亞歷克斯！”“莎拉，你在干嘛？”“米蘭達(dá)，最近怎么樣？”他們會(huì)因?yàn)槟汴P(guān)心和記得他們而感到高興，也就不會(huì)忘記你了。

7. 讓新朋友參與你的社交生活。邀請(qǐng)你的新朋友和你一起出去，一起去逛商場(chǎng)或是去某個(gè)不錯(cuò)的地方。大家在一起肯定會(huì)很開(kāi)心，所以你可以介紹新朋友和你的老朋友認(rèn)識(shí)，從這里開(kāi)始，通過(guò)一些能夠接受彼此的人，建立起你的社交圈。