樊夢陽

Different people hold their different family values because they are affected by different geography， religion and other aspects of their own culture. Family values play an important role because it is the foundation and the original formation environment of the whole values of the nations culture.

This issue attempts to compare the different family values between Chinese and Americans in terms of family education， marriage attitude ，and value of family honor， analysis the cause of forming these differences from the perspective of cross-culture， and list a series of solutions to complete each other in order to have a better understanding of Chinese and America culture， promote the cultural exchange of these two countries， and provide more information for our English learning.

For Chinese culture is the typical representative of Oriental culture， while the culture of the United States is an epitome of the western countries， which concludes they reflects different core values. Chinese cultural values emphasize on collectivism， they assume that personal interests must subordinate to the interested to the whole community. However， Americans cherish the value of the individualism， which believes the individual is the core of the society.

I. Education in Family values

The most important relationship during every one's life is the relationship between the parents and their children. The parents' education values will， with any doubt， have a great influence upon the formation of the values of their kids， even throughout their whole life.

The family value difference between Chinese and Americans can be seen as a result from the difference between two different culture. Americans emphasis on equality， individualism， and developing independently， while Chinese people pay attention to the level of the relationship， they stress on fealty ，obedience， and the dependence between the family members. Family education has played a decisive role in one's growing and whole life.

II. Marriage in Family Values

A family is firstly composed of a couples， but the marriage attitude in China and America are different in many ways. Most Chinese families are in a pursuit of happiness knowing no bounds， which needs their mutual tolerance and forbearance.

In America， nearly all of the couples hold an equal relationship. Lived in a multiethnic， multicultural society， Americans believes that "Every man is the architect of his own fortune" （藺學才，2002）， thus， they have the right to marry freely without any prevention from their parents. They consider that their marriage will protected by law. The self-centered individualism made them respect privacy of their lovers. The husband are not willing to yield or obey to their wife. Both sides appreciate the personality that the other holds， and the lose of personality means lose of glamour. On the contrary， In China， the couples believe that "there is no difference between you and me"， they assume they belong to each other， and if some withhold information occurs， that means alienation， the wife often opens husband's letter， while the husband always check his wife's message.endprint