MlSHMASH

多棱鏡

TOO HOT FOR TV

The TV drama Saga of Wu Zetian (《武媚娘傳奇》), featuring the life of China’s only empress, has been jokingly renamed“Saga of Bighead Wu”, thanks to SAPPRFT, formerly known as SARFT. Only a week after its debut in late December, 2014, this drama was axed by the TV station for a “technical reason”. Viewers suspected that the revealing low-cut tops on the female characters might have been the trigger. Lo-and-behold, the suspicion was proven true when the drama came back on air in 2015. After re-editing, viewers could only see close-ups of the characters’ faces and everything below their necks had been edited out. Some supporters say that it’s better to see the big heads rather than the “squeezed breasts”—even though it doesn’t exactly help with the boring plot. Others claim the edited scenes seriously affected the composition and storyline. Though, it seems the revealing costumes were the one thing the show had going for it, considering the over-the-top headgear, dull plot, and tedious dialogue; relegating it to the bin rather than the editing desk may have been the better option. - SUN JlAHUl (孫佳慧)

CHlNA GOES SKYRlM

“I used to be an adventurer like you, until I took an arrow to the knee.” That quote is from the popular game The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, and spawned a legion of online memes. But for Mr. Wang from Changsha, the meme came to life—making him online fodder in the guise of an NPC. Wang was just hanging his clothes on his balcony when he was suddenly shot in the knee with an arrow, which went 12 centimeters into his leg. It turned out that Wang’s neighbor Mr. Liang was practicing archery nearby. Liang was 70 or 80 meters away from Wang at the time, but the arrow somehow missed the target and hit him square in his leg, leading to surgery. While the online world had a feld day with this in relation to the popular RPG, no comment has been made by Liang as to whether or not he is a Bosmer Wood Elf or if he leveled up. - S.J.

MGM LOGO COMES TO LlFE

Lions don’t have it particularly well in the circus (also it’s horrible and shameful and you shouldn’t go see it)—no room to run around, no pride of females, no good movies. Well, one lion in Guangxi Province had enough of this rubbish and decided to take a day out at the pictures. As the circus animals were being loaded into their cages in preparation for an upcoming performance, a staff member carelessly opened the door of the cage, and the lion rushed off to an abandoned cinema 100 meters away. Unfortunately for the lion, no flm was currently playing. And, more bad luck followed when thelion fell through the wood boards, which were unable to bear the beast’s weight, resulting in the animal getting trapped beneath the stage. Circus staff were able to catch the lion with quilts and nets. No injuries were reported, either for the lion or the circus staff members. - S.J.

HARD OUT THERE FOR A FOODlE

Bad news, food lovers: Chongqing has announced a ban on smoked bacon. Sichuan made the same move earlier in the year, with the local Environmental Protection Bureau stating that it is a major cause of smog, inviting quite a bit of public ridicule. The entire industry is required to now use clean energy for the process or incur a hefty fne. Since it’s not really feasible to ask someone who makes smoked bacon for a living to shell out to meet these new requirements, it’s far more likely that this street dish is going to taper off altogether. This also means that other foods are for the chopping block, such as other smoked meats and frewood chicken. Some people think this is an unnecessary casualty of the smog wars. But others say the regulations are necessary and helpful but propose compensation for operators of smoked bacon businesses. After all, the government has to do something to clear up the choking skies and not much else is working. - S.J.

THEY SEE ME ROLLlN’, THEY HATlN’

Of all the bonuses of being a corrupt offcial, having some sweet wheels is one of the best. But some have been caught, in the words of American poet Chamillionaire,“ridin’ dirty”. As part of a“corruption on wheels” crackdown, the Chinese central government has impounded 3,184 offcial vehicles to be sold at three separate auctions. The frst batch of 300 were all sold after the last hammer fell in February, and to many people’s surprise, the vehicles sold at a premium rate. A mysterious buyer and his companion bought at least 11 government vehicles at auction. When asked why, he said it was just for his collection. Before the auctions began, many stipulations were made to keep the prices up, just in case there was some unoffcial inside trading. Some buyers said they were willing to pay big for that bigwig luck—also saying the cars would help them “gain face” with others. Given the prices these wheels sold for, it seems these corrupt offcials did, indeed, make an unexpected contribution to the state.- S.J.