沒(méi)有人有耐心聽(tīng)你講完自己的故事，因?yàn)槊總€(gè)人都有自己的話要說(shuō)；沒(méi)有人喜歡聽(tīng)你抱怨生活，因?yàn)槊總€(gè)人都有自己的苦痛；世人多半寂寞，這世界愿意傾聽(tīng)、習(xí)慣沉默的人，難得幾個(gè)。我再也不想對(duì)別人提起自己的過(guò)往，那些掙扎在夢(mèng)魘中的寂寞、荒蕪，還是交給時(shí)間，慢慢淡漠?！獛酌?/p>

Studies have shown it takes a physician about 18 seconds to interrupt a patient after they begin talking.

It was Sunday. I had one last patient to see. I approached her room in a hurry and stood at the doorway. She was an older woman， sitting at the edge of the bed， struggling to put socks on her swollen feet. I crossed the threshold， spoke quickly to the nurse， scanned her chart noting she was in stable condition.

I leaned on the bedrail looking down at her. She asked if I could help put on her socks. Instead， I launched into a monologue that went something like this： “How are you feeling？ Your sugars and blood pressure were high but theyre better today. The nurse mentioned youre anxious to see your son whos visiting you today. Its nice to have family visits from far away. I bet you really look forward to seeing him.”

She stopped me with a stern， authoritative voice. “Sit down， doctor. This is my story， not your story.”

I was surprised and embarrassed. I sat down. I helped her with the socks. She began to tell me that her only son lived around the corner from her， but she had not seen him in five years. She believed that the stress of this contributed greatly to her health problems. After hearing her story and putting on her socks， I asked if there was anything else I could do for her. She shook her head no and smiled. All she wanted me to do was to listen.

Each story is different. Some are detailed； others are vague. Some have a beginning， middle and end. Others wander without a clear conclusion. Some are true； others are not. Yet all those things do not really matter. What matters to the storyteller is that the story is heard—without interruption， assumption or judgment.

Listening to someones story costs less than expensive diagnostic testing but is key to healing and diagnosis.

I often thought of what that woman taught me， and I reminded myself of the importance of stopping， sitting down and truly listening. And， not long after， in an unexpected twist， I became the patient， with a diagnosis of multiple sclerosis at the age of 31. Now， 20 years later， I sit all the time—in a wheelchair.

For as long as I could， I continued to see patients from my chair， but I had to resign when my hands were affected. I still teach medical students and other health care professionals， but now from the perspective of physicians and patients.

I tell them I believe in the power of listening. I tell them I know firsthand that immeasurable healing takes place within me when someone stops， sits down and listens to my story.

研究證明，醫(yī)生和病人開(kāi)始交談后，醫(yī)生會(huì)在大概18秒后打斷病人的敘述。

那是一個(gè)周日，我要去見(jiàn)最后一位病人。我匆匆忙忙地走向她的病房，站到了門(mén)口。病人是位老婦人，此時(shí)她正坐在床沿上努力地為自己浮腫的雙腳穿上襪子。我跨進(jìn)屋，快速和護(hù)士進(jìn)行了交流，然后看了看病人的病歷表。根據(jù)表格上的記錄，她目前狀況穩(wěn)定。

我倚在床欄上低頭看著她。她問(wèn)我是否可以幫她把襪子穿上，我沒(méi)有回答，而是自顧自地說(shuō)起來(lái)：“你感覺(jué)怎么樣？你的血糖和血壓以前有點(diǎn)高，不過(guò)今天好多了。你的兒子今天要來(lái)看你，護(hù)士說(shuō)你非常想見(jiàn)他。有家人遠(yuǎn)道來(lái)看望自己真是不錯(cuò)。我相信你真的很渴望見(jiàn)到他?！贝蟾啪褪沁@類話。

她用一種嚴(yán)厲、命令式的口氣將我打斷：“醫(yī)生，坐下來(lái)。這是我的事兒，不是你的?！?/p>

我既驚訝又尷尬。我坐了下來(lái)，幫她穿襪子。她開(kāi)始告訴我，她的獨(dú)生子就住在她家附近，但她已經(jīng)有五年沒(méi)見(jiàn)到他了。她認(rèn)為，這件事給她的壓力在很大程度上加重了她的病情。聽(tīng)完她的故事并幫她穿上襪子后，我問(wèn)她，我還能為她做些什么。她搖了搖頭表示沒(méi)有，然后笑了起來(lái)。她要讓我做的全部事情就是聽(tīng)她講故事。

每個(gè)故事都是不同的。有些故事詳細(xì)，有些卻模糊；有些故事有開(kāi)始、經(jīng)過(guò)和結(jié)果，有些則天馬行空，沒(méi)有明確的結(jié)論；有些故事是真實(shí)的，而有些不是。不過(guò)，這些要素都不重要。對(duì)講述者來(lái)說(shuō)，真正重要的是，這個(gè)故事要有人去傾聽(tīng)——沒(méi)有打斷、沒(méi)有臆斷，也沒(méi)有評(píng)價(jià)。

聽(tīng)別人講故事比進(jìn)行昂貴的診斷測(cè)試成本低得多，但它卻是治療和診斷的關(guān)鍵。

我經(jīng)常在想，那個(gè)老婦人究竟讓我懂得了什么。放下自己的想法，坐下來(lái)真誠(chéng)地傾聽(tīng)，我提醒自己要銘記這樣做的重要性。而就在那次會(huì)面后不久，事情發(fā)生了意想不到的大扭轉(zhuǎn)——我被確診患上了多發(fā)性硬化癥，成了一名病人。那年我31歲。如今，20年過(guò)去了，我需要一直坐著——坐在輪椅里。

我曾盡自己所能，坐在輪椅上繼續(xù)給病人看病。但當(dāng)我的雙手也出現(xiàn)癥狀后，我不得不選擇退休。如今我仍然為醫(yī)科學(xué)生和其他醫(yī)療專業(yè)人員上課，但現(xiàn)在不僅僅是站在醫(yī)生的角度，還會(huì)站在病人的角度。

我跟他們說(shuō)，我相信傾聽(tīng)是一劑良藥。我告訴他們，我親身體會(huì)到，當(dāng)有人停下自己的事，坐下來(lái)聆聽(tīng)你的故事時(shí)，那會(huì)在你的身體里產(chǎn)生無(wú)法估量的治愈力。

Word Study

approach /?'pr??t?/ v. 靠近，接近

launch /l??nt?/ v. 開(kāi)始從事，發(fā)起，發(fā)動(dòng)

vague /ve?g/ adj. 不清楚的，含糊的，不明確的，模糊的

assumption /?'s?mp?n/ n. 假定，假設(shè)，臆斷

resign /r?'za?n/ v. 辭職；辭去（某職務(wù)）