浙江杭州富陽區(qū)新登中學(xué) 胡君祥

一只鴿子突然飛入作者的屋子，因不幸撞在墻上而受重傷。在作者的精心護(hù)理下鴿子痊愈了，并且與作者的關(guān)系變得越來越親密。

題材人與自然 記敘文體裁 文章詞數(shù) 建議用時(shí)約340 6分鐘

難詞探意

1. deafening /?defn??/adj. 震耳欲聾的

2. resist /r??z?st/v. 抵抗

3. peck /pek/v. 啄

I was watching TV in the living room with my grandpa when a blinding flash of lightning flashed across the sky, followed by a deafening sound, and the pictures disappeared with that sound.Before I knew it, a gray-white shadow rushed in through the window and flew over my head.Bang! It hit the wall and slid off the wall to the floor. I was shaking with fear. I came closer and saw that it was a pigeon. It looked at me in fear, trying to open its wings, but powerless.

So I gave it a helping hand. I felt a few drops of warmth on my hands as I lifted it. It was blood! I gently spread its wings and there were a few red feathers inside. “Don't worry,we'll get it out alive,” Grandpa said to me. Then he took some cotton. We dried the blood, cleaned the wound, and then put it under a hairdryer to dry. All went better, for it had no strength left toresist. There happened to be an empty birdcage at home,so I put it in, and added a little water and some grains. After settling it down, I went to take my lunch break.

For the next few days, as soon as I got home from school, I would run to feed the pigeon. Little by little its strength returned. One evening, while I was drawing at the table, I found it was eating biscuits. A few days later, its wound was better; its feathers grew and it became brave. Whenever I sat at the table to eat a biscuit, it did not wait to one side as before, but instead looked up at me for a biscuit. To my joy, I could not only feed it the biscuit, but also touch it with my fingers. To my delight, I gently fingered its head, and it playfully pecked at me. After it completely recovered, I tied an orange rope around its leg to make it look pretty.

Useful sentence pattern

I was watching TV in the living room with my grandpa when a blinding flash of lightning flashed across the sky, followed by a deafening sound, and the pictures disappeared with that sound.

分析：be doing...when...意為“正在做某事，這時(shí)/突然……”。

仿寫：我們正在做家庭作業(yè)，這時(shí)燈熄了。

閱讀以上材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段，使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。

注意：

1. 所續(xù)寫短文的詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右；

2. 續(xù)寫部分分為兩段，每段的開頭語已為你寫好。Paragraph 1:

Paragraph 2:

寫作導(dǎo)引

一、析語篇，理要素

要想續(xù)寫內(nèi)容與所給短文之間邏輯連貫、銜接緊密，必須充分理解所給材料的大意，掌握作者想要傳達(dá)的意思。 本文是一篇記敘文，文章分析如下：

二、閱讀續(xù)寫開頭語，展開合理想象

基于原文本和續(xù)寫段落首句提供的信息， 采用圍繞中心提問的方法， 構(gòu)思要續(xù)寫的故事情節(jié)，這種方法一般分為四步：

第一步，根據(jù)已給出的文本判斷文章的立意。

根據(jù)第二段“作者精心照料鴿子”可推斷出本文的立意應(yīng)是愛護(hù)動(dòng)物。

第二步，根據(jù)續(xù)寫第二段所給出的段首句倒推續(xù)寫第一段應(yīng)包括什么內(nèi)容。

分析第二段的段首句可知，續(xù)寫第一段要寫到“爺爺讓鴿子飛走了”，這樣才能確保續(xù)寫的兩段是相銜接的。

第三步，圍繞續(xù)寫第一段所給出的段首句以及上面的分析進(jìn)行提問構(gòu)思：

（1）How did Grandpa let the pigeon fly away?

（2）What did Grandpa say when the author returned home?

（3）How did the author react when he learned the pigeon had flown away?

第四步，圍繞續(xù)寫第二段所給出的段首句進(jìn)行提問構(gòu)思：

（1）Was there the author's pigeon in the two pigeons?

（2）How did the author find one of them was his pigeon?

（3）What did the author's pigeon do?

（4）What does the author think about the pigeon flying away again?

三、潤(rùn)色成篇

在續(xù)寫的過程中要注意情節(jié)連貫和各部分內(nèi)容的相銜接，即：1. 兩段的續(xù)寫與所給短文的銜接；2. 每段的續(xù)寫與續(xù)寫段段首句之間的銜接；3. 續(xù)寫的兩段之間的銜接。 同時(shí)要注意語言風(fēng)格的一致和語法、句型，以及所用詞的準(zhǔn)確性。