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童年的煩惱

2018-01-09 20:23曉菲
初中生·考試 2018年12期
關(guān)鍵詞:凱茜桑德拉小屋

曉菲

◆原作節(jié)選◆

Chapter FourCathy Queen of Cats

She says, I am the great great grand cousin of the queen of France. She lives upstairs, over there, next door to Joe the baby -grabber. Keep away from him, she says. He is full of danger.

Benny and Blanca own the corner store. Theyre okay except dont lean on the candy counter.

Two girls raggedy as ratslive across the street. You dont want to know them. Edna is the lady who owns the building next to you. She used to own a building big as a whale, but her brother sold it. Their mother said no, no, dont ever sell it. I wont. And then she closed her eyes and he sold it. Alicia is stuck -up ever since she went to college. She used to like me but now she doesnt.

Cathy who is queen of cats has cats and cats and cats. Baby cats, big cats, skinny cats, sick cats. Cats asleep like little donuts. Cats on top of the refrigerator. Cats taking a walk on the dinner table. Her house is like cat heaven.

You want a friend, she says. Okay, Ill be your friend.But only tillnextTuesday.Thats when we move away. Got to. Then as if she forgot I just moved in, she says the neighborhoodis getting bad.

Cathys father will have to fly to France one day and find her great great distant grand cousin on her fathers side and inherit the family house. How do I know this is so? She told me so. In the meantime theyll just have to move a little farther north from Mango Street, a little farther away every time people like us keep moving in.

Chapter FiveA House of My Own

Not a flat. Not an apartment in back. Not a mans house. Not a daddys. A house all my own. With my porch and my pillow, my pretty purple petunias. My books and my stories. My two shoes waiting beside the bed. Nobody to shake a stick at. Nobodys garbage to pick up after. Only a house quiet as snow, a space for myself to go, clean as paper before the poem.

Chapter SixThe House on Mango Street I

We didnt always live on Mango Street. Before that we lived on Loomis on the third floor, and before that we lived on Keeler. Before Keeler it was Paulina, and before that I cant remember. But what I remember most is moving a lot. Each time it seemed thered be one more of us. By the time we got to Mango Street we were six———Mama, Papa, Carlos, Kiki, my sister Nenny and me.

The house on Mango Street is ours, and we dont have to pay rent to anybody, or share the yard with the people down stairs, or be careful not to make too much noise, and there isnt a landlord banging on the ceiling with a broom. But even so, its not the house wed thought wed get.

We had to leave the flat on Loomis quick. The water pipes broke and the landlord wouldnt fix them because the house was too old. We had to leave fast. We were using the washroom next doorandcarryingwateroverinemptymilk gallons. Thats why Mama and Papa looked for a house, and thats why we moved into the house on Mango Street, far away, on the other side of town.

Chapter SevenThe House on Mango Street II

They always told us that one day we would move into a house, a real that would be ours for always so we wouldnt have to move each year. And our house would have running water and pipes that worked. And inside it would have real stairs, not hallway stairs, but stairs inside like the house on T.V. And wed have a basement and at least threewashroomssowhenwetookabathwe wouldnt have to tell everybody.

Our house would be white with trees around it, a great big yard and grass growing without a fence. This was the house Papa talked about when he held a lottery ticket and this was the house Mama dreamed up in the stories she told us before we went to bed.

第四章貓皇后凱茜

她說(shuō),我是法蘭西皇后的遠(yuǎn)遠(yuǎn)遠(yuǎn)房表親。她住在樓上,那邊,那個(gè)“捉小孩的人”喬的隔壁。離他遠(yuǎn)點(diǎn),她告訴我說(shuō),他很危險(xiǎn)。

街角那家小店是班尼和布蘭卡的。他們還蠻好,可只有靠在糖果柜臺(tái)上時(shí)才對(duì)你好。

兩個(gè)像老鼠一樣邋遢的女孩住在街對(duì)面。你不會(huì)想去認(rèn)識(shí)她們的。埃德娜是你家隔壁房子的主人。她過(guò)去有幢大得像鯨魚的房子,可她弟弟把它賣了。他們的媽媽說(shuō),別,別呀,千萬(wàn)別賣。我不會(huì)的。可后來(lái)她一閉眼,他就賣了它。阿莉西婭自從上了大學(xué)就傲氣起來(lái)。她過(guò)去挺喜歡我,可現(xiàn)在不了。

貓皇后凱茜養(yǎng)了好多好多貓。貓寶寶、大個(gè)貓、瘦貓、病貓。睡姿像個(gè)面包圈的貓。爬到冰箱頂上的貓。在餐桌上散步的貓。她的房子就像個(gè)貓?zhí)焯谩?/p>

你想要個(gè)朋友。她說(shuō),好的,我會(huì)做你的朋友,可只能做到下星期二,那時(shí)我們就得搬走了,不得不搬了。然后,她似乎忘了我才搬進(jìn)來(lái),說(shuō),這個(gè)社區(qū)的人越來(lái)越雜了。

凱茜的父親有一天會(huì)要飛到法國(guó)去,找到遠(yuǎn)方的、她父親那邊的遠(yuǎn)遠(yuǎn)遠(yuǎn)房表親,去繼承家宅。我是怎么知道這些的呢?是她告訴我的。同時(shí),他們要從芒果街向北面搬遷,離開這里一點(diǎn)路,在每次像我們這樣的人家不斷搬進(jìn)來(lái)的時(shí)候。

第五章我自己的房子

不是小公寓。也不是陰面的大公寓。也不是哪個(gè)男人的房子。也不是爸爸的房子。是完完全全屬于我自己的。那里有我的前廊、我的枕頭,我漂亮的紫色矮牽牛。我的書和我的故事。我的兩只等在床邊的鞋。不用和誰(shuí)去作對(duì)。沒(méi)有別人扔下的垃圾要拾起。只是一所寂靜如雪的房子,一個(gè)自己歸去的空間,潔凈如同詩(shī)筆未落的紙。

第六章芒果街上的小屋1

我們先前不住芒果街。先前我們住魯密斯的三樓。再先前我們住基勒,基勒再往前是波萊納,再前面,我就不記得了。我記得最清楚的是,搬了好多次家。似乎每搬一次,我們就多出一個(gè)人。搬到芒果街時(shí),我們有了六個(gè)———媽媽、爸爸、卡洛斯、奇奇、妹妹蕾妮和我。

芒果街上的小屋是我們的,我們不用交房租給任何人,或者和樓下的人合用一個(gè)院子,或者小心翼翼別弄出太多的聲響,這里也沒(méi)有拿掃帚猛敲天花板的房東??删退氵@樣,它也不是我們?cè)詾樽约嚎梢缘玫降哪欠N房子。

我們得趕緊搬出魯密斯的公寓。水管破了,房東不愿意修理,因?yàn)榉孔犹?。我們得快快離開。我們借用著鄰居的衛(wèi)生間,用空的牛奶壺把水裝過(guò)來(lái)。這就是為什么爸媽要找房子,這就是為什么我們搬進(jìn)了芒果街上的小屋,遠(yuǎn)遠(yuǎn)的,從城市的那一邊。

第七章芒果街上的小屋2

他們一直對(duì)我們說(shuō),有一天,我們會(huì)搬進(jìn)一所房子,一所真正的大屋,永遠(yuǎn)屬于我們,那樣我們就不用每年搬家了。我們的房子會(huì)有自來(lái)水和好用的水管。里面還有真正的樓梯,不是門廳臺(tái)階,而是像電視上的房子里那樣的樓梯。我們會(huì)有一個(gè)地下室和至少三個(gè)衛(wèi)生間,那樣洗澡的時(shí)間就不用告訴每個(gè)人。

我們的房子會(huì)是白色的,四周是樹木,還有一個(gè)很大的院子,草兒生長(zhǎng)著,沒(méi)有籬笆把他們?nèi)ζ饋?lái)。這是爸爸手握彩票時(shí)提到的房子,這是媽媽在給我們講的睡前故事里幻想著的房子。

◆賞析◆

窗外沒(méi)有人經(jīng)過(guò),但吵鬧的聲音卻從未停止。春天的雨、夏天的蟬、秋天的落葉、冬天的雪花,一年四季里任何輕微的碰撞,都被填進(jìn)了整個(gè)日記本。這似乎是每一位愛讀書的孩子童年必經(jīng)的階段,擅長(zhǎng)把身邊細(xì)微的變化深掘出來(lái),再一一呈現(xiàn)在筆下。美國(guó)作家桑德拉·希斯內(nèi)羅絲更是抵達(dá)了尋常人無(wú)法逾越的境界,因?yàn)樗耐瓿涑庵舾泻蛻n郁、居無(wú)定所的迷茫,以及新移民所經(jīng)歷的歧視和疾苦。

作者桑德拉的父母都是從墨西哥移民到美國(guó)的后裔,所以她從小便跟隨家人居無(wú)定所地漂泊在異國(guó)他鄉(xiāng),最終選擇在“芒果街”這個(gè)拉美移民聚集的社區(qū)定居。本期推薦的《芒果街上的小屋》(The House on Mango Street),則是桑德拉對(duì)自己童年生活最真實(shí)的寫照。初讀第一遍,你感受更多的可能只是主人公渴望被社區(qū)認(rèn)可,渴望融入新環(huán)境,更渴望擁有屬于自己小屋的心路歷程。但細(xì)細(xì)品味,卻發(fā)現(xiàn)原來(lái)桑德拉的抱負(fù)遠(yuǎn)不止眼前的小期待。她用文字的力量讓人們重新審視拉美民族的地位,昭示了社會(huì)各階層的不公平待遇,并揭示了婦女社會(huì)地位低下的殘酷現(xiàn)實(shí)。

作品用44個(gè)看似獨(dú)立的小章節(jié),將記憶里的零碎片段串聯(lián)成了44首長(zhǎng)長(zhǎng)短短的詩(shī)歌。這些跳動(dòng)起伏的音符,譜寫出一段布滿泥濘的青春歲月,蘊(yùn)藏著記憶里的歡樂(lè)和心酸,比如對(duì)貧苦生活的無(wú)可奈何,更有著對(duì)知識(shí)改變命運(yùn)的信仰。

筆者從未想到,在看似漫不經(jīng)心的孩童日記里,還能孕育著如此溫柔、明亮的憧憬。難怪該書自1984年出版以來(lái),便在當(dāng)時(shí)高度重視族裔問(wèn)題的文化氛圍里,引起不小的轟動(dòng)和爭(zhēng)論。而文中別具風(fēng)味的詩(shī)化小說(shuō)風(fēng)格,將詩(shī)歌的藝術(shù)性融合在小說(shuō)的特性里,讓讀者能頃刻抵達(dá)作者的內(nèi)心世界。所以,《芒果街上的小屋》出版后,在美國(guó)的文學(xué)界也引起軒然大波,極大地推動(dòng)了美國(guó)后現(xiàn)代主義文學(xué)的發(fā)展。

本期節(jié)選的幾個(gè)章節(jié)反反復(fù)復(fù)提到了主人公日思夜想的“房子”。這個(gè)房子能放下舒適的床,能收藏自己全部的書籍,能種下希望的果樹,更重要的是,能夠建筑起抵御歧視與不公的壁壘,讓全家乃至整個(gè)家族都能覺(jué)醒起來(lái)。孩子們眼里干凈而簡(jiǎn)單的奢望,卻折射出濃郁的社會(huì)矛盾和偏見。為了實(shí)現(xiàn)更完整的自我價(jià)值,打破傳統(tǒng)的階級(jí)斗爭(zhēng),豈是憑借個(gè)人的努力就能實(shí)現(xiàn)的?通往自由王國(guó)之路崎嶇而艱辛,主人公沒(méi)有放棄期待,作者亦是。收起行囊,滿載書籍,走出芒果街,不僅僅只是為了改變個(gè)人的命運(yùn)。雖有著對(duì)故土的不舍與牽掛,卻是一條無(wú)可逃避之路,因?yàn)檫@條路抵達(dá)的終點(diǎn)太多太多,為實(shí)現(xiàn)拉美女性的自我救贖,為提高民族地位,為了讓全世界認(rèn)可芒果街……至少在作者桑德拉看來(lái),這些都是自己義不容辭的責(zé)任,而她也用畢生的努力將其一一實(shí)現(xiàn)了。

原來(lái),曾經(jīng)的出走,只是為了他日更輝煌地歸來(lái)。

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