點評/林巍

【原文】

[1]近代以降，許多中國先進知識分子紛紛倡導(dǎo)“教育救國”，興辦新式學(xué)校培養(yǎng)人才。[2]張伯苓痛心外侮和國家積弱，很早就提出，國家“自強之道，端在教育；創(chuàng)辦新教育，造就新人才”，[3]從此，開始艱難曲折的教育探索，[4]先后經(jīng)歷了模仿日本到模仿美國，進而走上從中國國情出發(fā)，將時代性與民族性相結(jié)合，尋求民族自強和推進中國現(xiàn)代化的“本土化”發(fā)展道路，極大地豐富了當(dāng)時中國的教育內(nèi)容。

【點評】

中國近現(xiàn)代史上，張伯苓先生作為杰出的教育家，創(chuàng)辦了私立南開系列學(xué)校，開中國新式教育之風(fēng)。

[1]中，所謂“近現(xiàn)代以降”就是近現(xiàn)代以后、以來。有參賽者譯成contemporary times，那是當(dāng)代；而in modern times大體不錯，但考慮到那只是“近現(xiàn)代”之始，故用since early modern times似更為確切；有的用了Since 1840，即以鴉片戰(zhàn)爭為標(biāo)志，也有一定道理?！跋冗M知識分子”有人譯成progressive intellectuals或liberal intellectuals，前者過于直譯，后者過于意譯，其實不妨用一般意義上的advanced intellectuals?！芭d辦新式學(xué)?！保瑃o build new schools顯然過于隨意：首先，build的原義是to make it by joining things together，是一種具體的動作；其次，這里的“新式”不是簡單的new，而是有本質(zhì)上的不同，故可用new-styled schools?！敖逃葒保S多人譯成了save China by education，但“通過教育……做事情”，其介詞多用through，如：防范犯罪的有效方法是教育。（The best way to guard against crime is through education.）同時，鑒于“教育救國”是一種理念，故在譯文中應(yīng)加上the idea of。

故此，整句不妨譯為：Since early modern times,many advanced intellectuals in China advocated the idea of “saving the country through education” and set up new-styled schools to train new talents.

[2]中，不少參賽者按照原文順序翻譯，如Zhang Boling felt deeply grieved at foreign bullying and Chinese weakness,thus…、Zhang Boling mourned the aggression and insult from foreign countries,as well as the accumulative weaknesses of the country、Zhang was extremely distressed by the insults from outside and the weakness inside,so he…等，實則對于此類句子的翻譯不妨使用狀語從句，以更有表現(xiàn)力，如：魯迅對于國民的愚昧程度極為失望，故決定棄醫(yī)從文。（So disappointed with the nation’s ignorance,Lu Xun decided to abandon medicine for literature.）對于“自強”，大都譯成self-improvement、self strength等，其實self-reliance更妥。“端（在教育）”，有的譯成end，顯然是理解錯誤，該詞在文言中有“開頭”之意，如：“惻隱之心，仁之端也”（《孟子·公孫丑上》）；“不見水端”（《莊子·秋水》）等。此處表其重要性，即“源于……”?！靶氯瞬拧保蚯懊嬉延衝ew talents，不必重復(fù)，可將其意含在“新教育”（new type of education）之中。

整句可譯為：Deeply saddened by foreign aggression and national weakness,Zhang Boling (1876—1951)had long proposed that “the way to self-reliance lies in education;that is to nurture talent by promoting a new type of education”.

[3]前雖為逗號，但譯文不妨另起一句，以更清晰?！捌D難曲折的教育探索”，有的譯得很“實”，如they initiated arduous and tortuous educational exploration、we ushered in an era of educational exploration with twists and turns等,多少有些“過了”。不妨將張伯苓教育改革的性質(zhì)融入進去：From then on,he started an arduous exploration of education reform.

[4]中，用了兩個“模仿”，不必譯成imitated Japan and emulated America，而可合為一個詞。其實，此處“因羨慕而仿效”，不妨用copy?！巴七M中國現(xiàn)代化”譯成promote China’s modernization過于直白，特別是要考慮該句賓語是“（走上）‘本土化’發(fā)展道路”，故要對句式做較大調(diào)整?！柏S富了……教育內(nèi)容”，一般譯成了enriched the content of education，過于字面化。實則，這里指的是“教學(xué)實踐”（teaching practice）。

故此，全句不妨譯為：It went through a process of copying Japan and the United States,before embarking on localization to improve national self-reliance and modernize China,in which modernity and nationality were combined according to the basic condition of the country and greatly enriched teaching practice in China.□

【優(yōu)勝者】

王成（上海）秦建梅（甘肅）@Crystal王美祺