祖瑞

Reading

During the Spring Festival， all the members of the family will get together on the eve to have a big dinner. Food such as fish， apples， noodle， dumplings， poke， chicken， candies are the most popular and will usually be served at the meal. They all symbolize for the lucky and happy days of the coming year. However， the main dish of this meal is always dumplings， which are indispensable on the table.

Here is one way to make a dumpling dish.

If you dont know how to make a dumpling dish， read the instructions above carefully and try to make it by yourself.

Tasks

1.How to remember words？

Can you remember new words quickly？ A prefix and suffix can help you. The word “indispensable” in the passage has a prefix “in-” and a suffix “-able”. The prefix “in-” means “not”， we can use it to form new words with opposite meaning. But one of the most common prefixes for adjectives or adverbs is “un-”， please read the passage and add “un-” to some words to give them the opposite meanings.

popular-unpopular

（? ? ? ? ? ?）-（? ? ? ? ? ?）

（? ? ? ? ? ?）-（? ? ? ? ? ?）

（? ? ? ? ? ?）-（? ? ? ? ? ?）

2.DIY and share

Your friend is calling to ask how to make a dumpling dish. Please tell her the instructions. You can use the adverbs， such as First， Next， Then and Finally.

Writing

Nowadays， if you need something， what will you do？ Buy one or do it by yourself？ If you did a DIY job and discovered the joy or pity of DIY， write about it titled “My DIY story”.

原文呈現(xiàn)

My DIY Story

I have a rabbit at home. It is my dear pet. I dont know when it was born. I got it on Feburary 1， so the day became its birthday.

Some time ago， when its birthday was coming， I asked myself， “What birthday present can I give my dear rabbit？” The rabbit was not very comfortable in winter， so I decided to make a jacket to keep it warm.

First， I measured its size. Then I asked my Mom to find a large piece of cloth. I used color pens to design patterns on the cloth. I drew stars and candies. Stars stood for wisdom and candies for happiness. I cut the cloth according to its size and knitted it up like a jacket.It took the rabbit some time to get used to the jacket. It could hop around with the jacket.

But soon I found a problem. When the jacket became dirty， it could not be washed. The cloth was not strong and could be torn easily. I am still thinking about how to solve the problem.

Maybe someday in the future， I will make my dear rabbit a new jacket. I like my rabbit， and I hope it likes its birthday present.

對“兔子”的介紹稍顯冗長，建議開門見山，直接闡述DIY的原因，點明主題。

正文部分可以重點介紹DIY的步驟以及遇到的問題和感受。注意使用合適的連詞或表示順序的詞，使銜接更加自然。

結(jié)尾部分要點題，首尾呼應(yīng)?？梢詫懸粚懽约簩@一次DIY經(jīng)歷的感受。

升格展示

My DIY Story

I dream of becoming a fashion designer in the future. My first design was a small jacket and you can never guess who it was for. It was for my dear rabbit. When its birthday was coming this year， I decided to make a jacket as its birthday present.

First， I had to measure the size of the rabbit. It was easier said than done， because the rabbit kept struggling and made quite a mess. Then I found a large piece of cloth. I used color pens to design patterns on the cloth. I also drew bright stars and delicious candies. Stars stand for wisdom and candies for happiness. I cut the cloth carefully and knitted it up like a jacket. I even made a rose with the cloth and stuck it on the jacket. I tried to fit the jacket on the rabbit. However， it did not like the jacket at first and even left a scratch on my hand. Then I realized that I forgot to consider its hair， so the jacket was too tight. I used the rest of the cloth to make it larger. Finally， I added some colors on the cloth so that the jacket could match the color of the rabbit hair. It looked much better on the rabbit， although small pieces of cloth were left everywhere in the room.

This is my DIY story. I learned a lot from my first design. I understood the true meaning of “Practice makes perfect.” I believe I can become a fashion designer. The small jacket for my rabbit will turn into a gorgeous dress in the future.

（江蘇省南京市第二十九中學(xué)初中部 張卉琳；指導(dǎo)教師 金珣）

綜合點評

作文主題明確，結(jié)構(gòu)清晰，圍繞“DIY的原因→步驟→結(jié)果”這一邏輯順序展開。升格后的作文內(nèi)容豐富多彩，語言生動形象，情感細膩，讀來親切自然。小作者增加了很多細節(jié)描寫，將DIY的過程生動形象地展現(xiàn)在讀者面前，表達了對寵物的喜愛之情。小作者能熟練運用復(fù)合句，如When...，I decided to...和...so that...來進行表達?！癐t was easier said than done.”和“Practice makes perfect.”等諺語的使用則讓文章錦上添花。