在讀后續(xù)寫創(chuàng)作中，神情交融描寫是一種營(yíng)造畫面感的寫作技巧，它將角色外在的與頭部、手部、心臟和腳部等相關(guān)的神態(tài)變化和內(nèi)心情感活動(dòng)緊密結(jié)合起來，使讀者仿佛能夠看到人物的靈魂深處。這種描寫技巧的運(yùn)用不僅讓故事更加豐富多彩，還能讓讀者深入角色的情感世界，產(chǎn)生強(qiáng)烈共鳴。通過細(xì)膩且富有感染力的筆觸，作者引導(dǎo)讀者走進(jìn)人物的內(nèi)心世界，感受他們的喜怒哀樂，從而營(yíng)造出鮮活且富有感染力的畫面。

一、 神情交融描寫在2024年高考英語新課標(biāo)Ⅰ卷讀后續(xù)寫中的體現(xiàn)與協(xié)同應(yīng)用

在2024年高考英語新課標(biāo)Ⅰ卷讀后續(xù)寫題所給出的閱讀文本（下文）中，筆者就發(fā)現(xiàn)兩處生動(dòng)的神情交融描寫。

I met Gunter on a cold， wet and unforgettable evening in September. I had planned to fly to Vienna and take a bus to Prague for a conference. Due to a big storm， my flight had been delayed by an hour and a half. I touched down in Vienna just 30 minutes before the departure of the last bus to Prague. The moment I got off the plane， I ran like crazy through the airport building and jumped into the first taxi on the rank without a second thought.

That was when I met Gunter. I told him where I was going， but he said he hadnt heard of the bus station. I thought my pronunciation was the problem， so I explained again more slowly， but he still looked confused. When I was about to give up， Gunter fished out his little phone and rang up a friend. After a heated discussion that lasted for what seemed like a century， Gunter put his phone down and started the car.

Finally， with just two minutes to spare we rolled into the bus station. Thankfully， there was a long queue（隊(duì)列）still waiting to board the bus. Gunter parked the taxi behind the bus， turned around， and looked at me with a big smile on his face. “We made it，” he said.

Just then I realised that I had zero cash in my wallet. I flashed him an apologetic smile as I pulled out my Portuguese bankcard. He tried it several times， but the card machine just did not play along. A feeling of helplessness washed over me as I saw the bus queue thinning out.

At this moment， Gunter pointed towards the waiting hall of the bus station. There， at the entrance， was a cash machine. I jumped out of the car， made a mad run for the machine， and popped my card in， only to read the message： “Out of order. Sorry.”

根據(jù)讀后續(xù)寫的語言協(xié)同性原則（讀后續(xù)寫要求續(xù)寫內(nèi)容與原文的語言風(fēng)格保持一致，包括詞匯、句法、語法等方面。考生需要通過閱讀原文，理解作者的語言習(xí)慣和表達(dá)方式，并在續(xù)寫中進(jìn)行模仿和運(yùn)用），考生可在續(xù)寫段落中融入對(duì)主要人物角色的神情交融描寫，以營(yíng)造靈動(dòng)畫面。融入神情交融描寫的參考范文如下。

I ran back to Gunter and told him the bad news.On hearing that， he frowned， confusion written on his face （句1）. I thought to myself that he would insist on my paying him immediately. However， instead of demanding the fare， he merely flashed me a kind smile and signaled for me to leave（句2）. “Dont worry about the fare. Go and catch the bus！” he urged with his eyes shimmering with sincerity（句3）. For a moment， I could scarcely stammer out a “Thank you”. I promptly write down his phone number， assuring him that I would undoubtedly pay him back. In no time， I ran like crazy once again， boarded the bus and waved goodbye to Gunter.

Four days later， when I was back in Vienna， I called Gunter as promised. We agreed to meet at the same taxi rank where we first met. As I approached him， I noticed him leaning against his car， a warm and friendly smile spreading across his face（句4）. The sight of his welcoming expression made my heart leap with a sense of relief and happiness（句5）. I could hardly wait to convey my sincere gratitude for his kindness and handed him the money I owed him. Deeply touched by his generosity， I firmly insisted on treating him to some food. We discovered a cafe nearby and chatted for a long time. Gradually， a wonderful friendship based on trust and kindness emerged．

句1中的“he frowned， confusion written on his face”（他皺起了眉頭，臉上寫滿了困惑）這一神情交融的描寫，展示了Gunter在聽到壞消息時(shí)的即時(shí)反應(yīng)。這種描寫不僅傳達(dá)了他內(nèi)心的不解，還為讀者提供了一個(gè)情感上的窗口，讓我們能夠感同身受地理解他的心理狀態(tài)。同時(shí)，這種描寫也為后文的情節(jié)發(fā)展設(shè)置了基調(diào)，即盡管他感到困惑，但他的行為可能會(huì)出乎意料地寬容和理解。

句2中的“he merely flashed me a kind smile and signaled for me to leave”（他只是對(duì)我友好地微笑，并示意我可以離開）這一神情交融的描寫，顯示了Gunter的善良和寬容。這個(gè)微笑和手勢(shì)是對(duì)前一句困惑表情的直接對(duì)比，突出了他決定不追究車費(fèi)的慷慨行為。這種描寫加深了讀者對(duì)Gunter角色性格的理解，為故事增添了溫暖和正面的情感色彩。

句3中的“his eyes shimmering with sincerity”（他的眼睛閃爍著真誠）這一神情交融的描寫，強(qiáng)化了Gunter的真誠和善意。眼睛作為心靈的窗戶，這里的描寫不僅傳達(dá)了他話語背后的真實(shí)情感，也進(jìn)一步鞏固了他作為一個(gè)充滿善意和可信賴人物的形象。這種描寫有助于建立讀者對(duì)Gunter的信任感，并為兩人之間可能發(fā)展的關(guān)系打下基礎(chǔ)。

句4中的“a warm and friendly smile spreading across his face”（一個(gè)溫暖友好的微笑在他的臉上擴(kuò)散開來）這一神情交融的描寫，表現(xiàn)了Gunter在重逢時(shí)的積極情緒。這個(gè)微笑不僅反映了他對(duì)再次見面的期待，也傳遞了一種開放和接納的態(tài)度。這種描寫有助于營(yíng)造一個(gè)溫馨和愉快的重逢氛圍，為兩人之間建立友誼提供了情感上的橋梁。

句5中的“The sight of his welcoming expression made my heart leap with a sense of relief and happiness”（看到他歡迎的表情，我的心因?yàn)獒屓缓涂鞓范鴦?dòng)）這一神情交融的描寫，揭示了敘述者對(duì)Gunter表情的積極反應(yīng)。這種描寫不僅表達(dá)了敘述者內(nèi)心的感激和愉悅，也反映了Gunter的表情對(duì)敘述者情緒的影響。這種互動(dòng)加深了兩人之間的情感聯(lián)系，并為故事中友誼的發(fā)展增添了深度。

以上范文中的神情交融描寫細(xì)膩地傳達(dá)了人物的內(nèi)心情緒和情感變化，增強(qiáng)了故事的感染力和真實(shí)性，讓讀者能夠更好地共情和理解人物的感受。

二、神情交融描寫的作用和案例 （以《夏洛的網(wǎng)》為例）

1. 豐富人物形象，使人物更加立體、生動(dòng)。通過細(xì)致的神情交融描寫，讀者可以更好地了解角色的性格特點(diǎn)、心理狀態(tài)和情感變化，從而對(duì)人物產(chǎn)生更深刻的印象。

［例1］ （長(zhǎng)睫毛襯托可愛）He looked cute when his eyes were closed， because his lashes（睫毛）were so long.他閉著眼的時(shí)候看起來格外的可愛，因?yàn)樗难劢廾悄敲吹拈L(zhǎng)。

［例2］ （與外在神態(tài)對(duì)比反襯善良與忠誠）Underneath her rather bold and cruel exterior， she had a kind heart， and she was to prove loyal and true to the very end.在她那可怕冷漠的外表下，有著一顆善良的心，以后發(fā)生的事情將證明，她對(duì)朋友是忠實(shí)，真誠的，每一刻都是如此。

［例3］（揉眼睛顯現(xiàn)驚訝）He brushed his hand across his eyes and stared harder at Charlottes web.他用手來回揉了揉眼睛，死死地盯向夏洛的網(wǎng)。

2. 增強(qiáng)故事情節(jié)的感染力。當(dāng)人物的神情與情感相互交織時(shí)，讀者可以更直觀地感受到人物在故事中的喜怒哀樂，從而更容易被故事所打動(dòng)。

［例4］ （擔(dān)憂的神態(tài)畫面）She was staring at Fern with a worried expression on her. 她用一種擔(dān)憂的表情盯著弗恩的臉。

［例5］ （思念的神態(tài)畫面） Every day Wilburn would stand and look at the torn， empty web， and a lump would come to his throat. No one had ever had such a friend-so affectionate， so loyal， and so skillful.每天威爾伯都會(huì)走到那里站一會(huì)兒，望望那張殘破不堪的空網(wǎng)，這時(shí)他就會(huì)哽噎起來。從沒有人有過這樣一個(gè)朋友——這樣親密的，這樣忠誠的，這樣聰慧的朋友。

［例6］（激動(dòng)的神態(tài)畫面） Wilburs heart pounded. he began to squeal. Then he raced in circles， kicking manure into the air. Then he turned a back flip. Then he planted his front feet and came to a stop in front of Charlottes children.威爾伯心里充滿了驕傲。他幸福地狂叫起來。接著他開始轉(zhuǎn)著圈兒地跑，把牛糞向空中踢去。然后他又跑回來，抬起他的前腳，停到了夏洛的孩子們面前。

［例7］ （悲傷/痛苦的神態(tài)畫面） Hearing this， Wilbur threw himself down in an agony of pain and sorrow. Great sobs racked his body. He heaved and grunted with desolation.聽到這些話，威爾伯立刻沉浸到巨大的痛苦和憂傷之中。他痛苦地絞動(dòng)著身子，哭叫起來。

3. 推動(dòng)故事情節(jié)的發(fā)展。通過人物神情的變化，可以揭示出人物之間的矛盾、沖突和關(guān)系變化，從而為故事的發(fā)展奠定基礎(chǔ)。

［例8］ （揭示人物關(guān)系畫面） He would stand and gaze up at her with adoring eyes. 這時(shí)他會(huì)站起來，用充滿深情的眼睛注視著她。

［例9］ （因幸福感而進(jìn)一步行動(dòng)） Wilburs heart brimmed with happiness. He felt that he should make a short speech on this very important occasion.威爾伯的心里盛滿了幸福。他感到應(yīng)該為這個(gè)重要時(shí)刻發(fā)表一場(chǎng)簡(jiǎn)短的演說。

［例10］ （恐懼感刻畫角色心理沖突） The thought of death came to him and his legs began to tremble with fear.他開始想到了死，就害怕得哆嗦起來。

三、神情交融描寫經(jīng)典語料的歸納與總結(jié)

1.喜悅/興奮

［例11］A smile lit up her face and her eyes were shining/sparkling with great joy．

她的臉上露出了笑容，眼睛里閃爍著喜悅的光芒。

［例12］A bright smile curved her lips and her

eyes sparkled with gladness， as if she had just discovered the most precious thing.一個(gè)明亮的微笑使她的嘴唇彎曲，她的眼睛閃爍著喜悅，仿佛她剛剛發(fā)現(xiàn)了最珍貴的東西。

2.感動(dòng)/寬慰

［例13］She gathered the children in her arms and

held them close. 她把孩子們攬入懷中，緊緊地抱住他們。

［例14］Lost in the delicious breakfast and pure

love from her twins， she sobbed， with delightful tears streaming down her face. 她沉浸在美味的早餐和她的雙胞胎純潔的愛中，抽泣著，開心的眼淚從臉上流下來。

3.憤怒

［例15］Jane could hardly contain her anger， slamming her fist on the desk in anger．

簡(jiǎn)無法抑制她的憤怒，憤怒地用拳頭猛錘桌子。

［例16］She looked at him with eyes flashing with anger， looking as if she were going to burst. 她憤怒地看著他，看上去快要?dú)庹恕?/p>

4.悲傷

［例17］With a heavy heart， she wondered if she would ever find someone who truly understood and valued her. 心情沉重，她想知道是否會(huì)找到一個(gè)真正理解和珍視她的人。

［例18］On hearing the bad news， she lowered down her head， tears streaming/rolling/pouring down her cheeks. 聽到這個(gè)壞消息，她垂下了頭，淚流滿面。

5.恐懼

［例19］Extremely frightened， I felt my legs were trembling and my palms were sweating. 我非常害怕，覺得我的雙腿在顫抖，我的手掌在出汗。

［例20］A flood of fear swept over him. His throat tightened and his knees felt weak. 他驚恐不已，喉嚨發(fā)緊，膝蓋發(fā)軟。

6.緊張

［例21］Her face turned pale， feeling like sitting on pins and needles．

她臉色蒼白，感覺如坐針氈。

［例22］ With trembling hands and a racing heart， I nervously opened the acceptance letter. 雙手顫抖、心跳加速，我緊張地打開了錄取通知書。

7.尷尬

［例23］Disappointment and embarrassment written on her burning face， she felt tears began to well up in her eyes.失望和尷尬寫在她灼熱的臉上，她感到眼淚開始涌上眼眶。

［例24］So embarrassed was she that she stood there clumsily feeling the blood rushing to her face. 她太尷尬了，笨拙地站在那里，感到血液涌上臉頰。

8.驚訝

［例25］My jaw dropped to thd62ea84d4ea004335dc0a3f1d9804d19e ground when I looked at the grade on my math paper. 看到數(shù)學(xué)卷子成績(jī)的那一刻，我簡(jiǎn)直要驚掉下巴。

［例26］A spark of surprise flashed across his face. He froze there， staring at me with wide eyes. 他的臉上閃過一絲驚奇。他驚得瞪大眼睛看著我。

四、神情交融描寫時(shí)應(yīng)當(dāng)避免的問題

1.缺乏真實(shí)感

有些學(xué)生在進(jìn)行神情交融描寫時(shí)，會(huì)過于夸張或脫離實(shí)際情況，致使讀者難以產(chǎn)生共鳴。比如：“On hearing the news， his face curved in an extremely exaggerated way that made him look like a monster from a horror movie， and his eyes popped out of their sockets as if they were springs.” 聽到這個(gè)消息時(shí)，他的臉以一種極其夸張的方式扭曲，讓他看起來像恐怖電影

里的怪物，他的眼睛從眼眶里凸出來，仿佛像彈簧一樣。

此句中的神情交融描寫太過奇特，脫離實(shí)際且不符合常理，會(huì)給人很怪異與不合理之感。作者可嘗試將自身置入所描寫的情境，避免過度夸張的表述，盡量使神情描寫處于合理范疇，更貼近生活實(shí)際。

2.與情節(jié)不匹配

神情交融描寫應(yīng)與故事情節(jié)及角色的情感狀態(tài)相適配，若不匹配，會(huì)讓讀者感到困惑或不真實(shí)。例如：Lily stood in the corner. She was very regretful for misunderstanding her mother. Tears silently slipped down her cheeks and dropped onto the floor. Panic flickered in her eyes， as if she was afraid that something unknown would hurt her. Lily 站在墻角，她因誤解母親而極為后悔。淚水無聲地從她臉頰滑落，滴落在地板上。而她眼神中閃爍的驚慌，仿佛在害怕有未知事物會(huì)傷害她。

以上語段結(jié)尾處的神情交融描寫使讀者難以理解角色的行為動(dòng)機(jī)，顯得不合理、突兀，破壞了故事的連貫性與整體性，讓讀者難以沉浸其中并產(chǎn)生共鳴。作者應(yīng)當(dāng)細(xì)致分析故事的走向及具體情境，使神情描寫與之緊密結(jié)合，符合當(dāng)時(shí)的氛圍與發(fā)展邏輯。

3.過度使用

對(duì)人物神情和情感的刻畫占據(jù)篇幅過大，且描寫手法過于密集、夸張和繁復(fù)。例如：The boy found himself in a risky situation where he was about to be attacked by a ferocious wolf. His face distorted into an expression of excessive fear， his eyes bulged so wide that it seemed they might pop out any moment， and his mouth opened with a shout that could shatter glass. His whole body trembled uncontrollably and sweat streamed down his face. 男孩發(fā)現(xiàn)自己處于一個(gè)危險(xiǎn)境地，即將遭到一只兇猛狼的攻擊。他的臉扭曲成過度恐懼的表情，他的眼睛瞪得極大，似乎隨時(shí)可能蹦出，他張開嘴發(fā)出一聲可震碎玻璃的喊叫。他的整個(gè)身體失控地顫抖，汗水如水流般從他臉上淌下。

上面語段中的神情交融描寫冗長(zhǎng)繁瑣，給人以堆砌和濫用之感，不利于推動(dòng)后續(xù)情節(jié)的發(fā)展。作者在描寫時(shí)，應(yīng)用簡(jiǎn)潔有力的語句傳達(dá)關(guān)鍵信息，不過多進(jìn)行不必要的渲染。

五、結(jié)語

神情交融描寫在高考英語讀后續(xù)寫中有著極為顯著的作用。它能夠使人物形象變得更加鮮活靈動(dòng)，讓讀者仿若身臨其境。借由對(duì)人物神情的刻畫，像是喜悅的笑容、焦慮的眼神等等，能夠細(xì)致入微地呈現(xiàn)出其內(nèi)心世界，增強(qiáng)故事的感染力。這不但有益于推動(dòng)情節(jié)的進(jìn)展，還能讓續(xù)寫的內(nèi)容更為豐富且真實(shí)。恰到好處的神情交融描寫能夠令文章更具吸引力，提升作文的層級(jí)，使閱卷老師體會(huì)到考生對(duì)語言的精確把控以及對(duì)人物情感的深刻領(lǐng)會(huì)，進(jìn)而為獲取高分筑牢堅(jiān)實(shí)的基礎(chǔ)。

【本文系海南省教育科學(xué)規(guī)劃專項(xiàng)課題“指向讀后續(xù)寫的英語經(jīng)典小說閱讀課CASE教學(xué)模式研究”（課題編號(hào)： QJH202310159， 主持人：朱敏）研究成果】

【作者簡(jiǎn)介：上海外國語大學(xué)三亞附屬中學(xué)朱敏高中英語名師工作室主持人，曾先后擔(dān)任高三英語備課組長(zhǎng)和高中英語教研長(zhǎng)，曾獲得長(zhǎng)沙市國開教育者和長(zhǎng)沙市三區(qū)支教優(yōu)秀教師等榮譽(yù)稱號(hào)，參與編寫教育教學(xué)著作3本】

責(zé)任編輯 吳昊雷